Trucker Suave

     This update is a guest spot on the moustache-mcgowan blogpost. I hope to make this a regular feature of the Adventures In Facial Hair Experimentation blog, so be excited to see some unfamiliar faces with new facial hair features to celebrate along with my own. The first guest spot has been granted to none other than the infamous Dancin' Danny Moustache. Danny has two great facial hair characteristics that really make his potential shaving style desirable. The first is an amazing follicle per square centimeter ratio. This quality can make any moustache connoisseur weak in the knees just thinking about it. The second is the impressively dark color of facial hair growth. This dense jungle of facial flora is prime for trimming into many imaginable styles just waiting to be discovered.

     The current shave of choice is a throwback to facial hair pioneers of old with a splash of new age inspiration. Remember the civil war? Me neither, but this design was inspired by a real American war hero and the hair that helped the Union soldiers win all those important battles against the ever under impressive southern states of the Confederacy and their un-patriotic lack of facial hair creativity. Not only that, but Ambrose Burnside was also the Governor of Rhode Island (America's least influential state) and the first president of the National Rifle Association though not necessarily all at the same time. His most memorable and historical accomplishment, however, was his ability to grow some gnarly burns for all the ladies of the day to enjoy. This is a snapshot of Ambrose sporting the goods. Be sure to notice the stoic look of confidence that the burns bestow upon all who may be brave enough to wear them. Its been said a time or two that facial hair longer than the hair on top of your head is an all natural aphrodisiac. The jury is still out, but lord knows I'm already a believer!

   
      Well, enough history, lets begin! To the immediate left is a picture of Danny with what I like to call "blank canvas face" for obvious reasons. I'll walk everyone through the steps just in case we have any beginning hair sculptors reading trying to fine tune their shaving skills. Remember gents, there is nothing a woman hates more that a poorly groomed facial fiasco. Try to remain calm while shaving and don't forget to breath! Step one is to remove any unwanted hair from your face that will not be in the final product. As you may have already guessed, most of the hair removal for this design will take place in the general chin region as displayed in the next photo of Danny hard at work

 chopping through the worst of it.
     Next, you just need to fine tune the edges with an electric razor until you achieve the proper shape desired. Once the final shape has been achieved, simply take a sharp razor and close shave the areas around your completed canvas with a little shave cream and hot water. Don't forget to rinse out the stubbles between the razorblades after every swipe to avoid some serious rash that could look like a skin disease to any potential mates out on the prowl. I'll leave you all with another potential final product picture. whichever of the two you choose to go with, remember that either one will be sufficient to attract members of your desired sex for a potential date or maybe just a romantic walk by the lakeside on a Saturday night. Whatever it is your heart desires, keep in mind, the more you switch up the styles, the better the variety of potential mates available to you. Ok friends, keep fighting against all forms of facial hair discrimination for future generations.

Yours truly,
Moustache McGowan

Gentleman Jack

      This is a progressive instructional guide on how to evolve one type of moustache into another increasingly refined type. The final product can be seen here on the right side of the screen and I call it the "Gentleman Jack" because it demands respect and radiates class from all who may dare approach the wearer. Often referred to as the "handlebar," I chose a more descriptive name in reference to the superior quality whiskey brewed by the famed Jack Daniels Distillery. As you may recall, my last facial display was the "Cowboy Dan" and so that is the moustache that I have started this transformation from. The before photo of me sporting this mature beauty is just below. Take a gander and don't be worried if it takes you more than a few minutes to soak in its gloriousness. I don't blame you. I find myself fixated every time I spy myself in the mirror wearing one of those babies.

     Now that you're ready to continue, lets start with the necessary supplies to morph that rough and ready face into a sophisticated dream-boat. Here I have taken a photo of the used supplies in this transformation.




 1) Shaving cream. Soap works as well, but the thicker the 'stache the tougher it becomes to fight through it, so for this mangy moustache, I used some good ole fashioned Barbasol.
2) Razor. This piece is critical to achieve a successful final product. I'll explain why later.
3) Pomade. Needed after the shaving to shape the hairs into spiraling vortexes of perfection.

     Now that we have the basics, I'll run you through the process. First, make sure the hairs on your moustache are sufficiently long enough to accommodate a proper curl on the end. I did this by growing out my previous moustache and curling the ends whenever possible to encourage rapid growth on the corners. Once satisfied with the achievable curl on the ends, time to start shaping. Basically, I began by shaving the flavor saver/ taint brush/ soul patch (whatever you want to call it) entirely off. In my opinion, this style looks the best on its own, but if you insist on the lower lip loving, a small, well-kept, upside down triangle is a popular accessory to the "Gentleman Jack" 'stache.
     Next, I shaved the shoulders off of the "Cowboy Dan" so as to leave only the upper lip hair, and the hair in the corners of the mouth to do the curling. Once my entire face was cleared of any excess hair, I began the curling procedure. Begin by taking a generous amount of pomade into your fingers, and rubbing in thoroughly through the entire moustache. This will enable you to properly style the entire length as well as the curled handlebars on the end. Once the main moustache is shaped appropriately, take your pointer and thumb finger on each hand and begin curling the tips of the moustache upwards on each respective side. It might take a few tries to get it just right. Don't be discouraged, remember that practice makes perfect even in the moustache styling business. I hope you enjoyed this new addition to the blog. Remember to keep styling.
Yours truly,

Moustache McGowan
 

Cowboy Dan

     Welcome to my blog. I am Moustache McGowan and I intend on taking you on an amazing journey through the underexplored realm of facial hair and all of its truely exciting possibilities. I hope you enjoy the blog enough to return from time to time to experience whats new and old in facial hair offerings.
     This is my first post and I intend on documenting the entire process of creating each individual facial artwork from now on, but because this particular configuration already exists on my face, I wanted to share it with you all. Im calling this the "Cowboy Dan." Not only because I look dashing in western wear, but because I mostly picture this moustache on middle-aged white males driving overly-used mid 1980's chevy pickup trucks across a dusty ranch road or somewhere in the back woods where city folk imagine cowboys live.
     I started by growing out a full beard untill the length was enough that facial design would turn out prominent enough for a really manly exposition. It took me about one month, but don't feel bad if it takes you a bit longer. What is important is that you enjoy the process of making beautiful man art on your face for all the world to see. After my beard was of appropriate length, I began by using an electric razor and trimming the areas of my face that I knew would not be a part of the final product. After most of the scraps had been trimmed down, I took to a standard razor to trim up the areas that I felt needed to go. Once this was complete, I threw on some western wear I had in my closet and hit the town. You would be amazed at the positive feedback I have recieved about this facial art so far.
     Just to add a few suggestions when planning your own facial hair bonanza. Have some inspiration in mind. Its O.K. to use something that you might have seen in a photo or out on the street and try to recreate it. As you become better versed in the capabilities of your razor and your face, better creations will come to mind. It's important to keep trying new things and not just give up and clean shave altogether. Remember, there are no such things as mistakes, only happy accidents. My personal inspiration for this piece was Val Kilmer's role in the movie "Tombstone." Obviously I have added my own flair to the final product, but this is a great example of how to be creative with your own works. Don't let the man keep you down and keep rocking that facial hair. Its a lost art we should strive to keep alive. Until next time, this is Moustache McGowan signing off.